October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. If your spouse has breast cancer, things have been way more challenging for you lately. New obstacles stand in your way of staying connected.
In any difficulty a couple faces, it can either bring you closer together or push you further apart.
You can emerge stronger in your relationship than ever before despite the challenges of breast cancer. Here are some ways to help foster that togetherness.
Process the Struggle of Breast Cancer Together
In short, talk about how the battle of breast cancer makes you feel as a couple. There’s plenty of talk about the importance of staying positive during cancer treatment for better results.
While it’s imperative that you both work towards a positive outlook, that doesn’t mean stuffing or ignoring the other feelings you may be struggling with.
Work through powerful feelings of anger, fear, uncertainty, fatigue, frustration and the insensitive remarks of others together. Only then will you be able to arrive at a non-conflicted, positive attitude.
If you’re having trouble communicating, consider counseling to work through the intense emotions you’re experiencing. Having need of a third-party professional is definitely understandable given all of the additional stress your family has been going through lately.
Cancer.gov recommends, “if you don’t feel like your communication needs are being met, you may want to seek help from a counselor or social worker.”
Seek Help from Others and a Higher Power
Depending on your spiritual beliefs, seek the guidance and help of a higher power. Consider praying and meditating as a couple. This can be a great way to gain new perspectives, increased strength and a stronger relational bond.
Along with seeking spiritual guidance, reach out to friends and family who can help. With the emotional and physical toll this is taking on your family, you’ll need all the support you can get.
That may mean a friend staying with your sick spouse while you’re at work, helping out financially or assisting with transportation to appointments.
You can’t do this on your own and that’s OK. Now is the time to remember that there are others nearby to help. You would do the same for others if the tables were turned.
Having adequate help will allow the two of you to focus more on your relationship. With the excess stress diffused, you’ll stand a better chance of staying connected.
Advocate Together for Proper Health Care
Work together for the best possible treatment. At times, your spouse with breast cancer will be too tired to advocate for themselves. That’s a great opportunity to step into that role and make sure everything is going as it ought to go.
The reality is that medical professionals are busy with many tasks. You and your spouse will be the best advocates for your breast cancer recovery. Don’t leave that responsibility to anyone else.
As a couple, you understand your needs in a unique way. Work together to keep appointments, monitor prescriptions and to communicate with healthcare professionals as needed. Working as a team will help to keep you connected relationally.
Consider Counseling to Help You Stay Bonded
Although mentioned briefly in this article, consider couples counseling especially if you feel your relationship drifting apart as a result of your fight with breast cancer.
Your cancer won’t be cured by seeing a counselor but you’ll receive evidence-based ways to better deal with the emotional and physical toll you’ve experienced lately. You’ll learn new ways to think about and talk about your obstacles.
If you’re in a relationship affected by breast cancer, you don’t have to face this struggle alone. You can schedule an appointment with Therapy With Compassion today and get the professional support you need. We’re conveniently located in Valencia, California.